Scared to be caught up

My head is going through some of the scariest thoughts right now.

The last time I thought about these things was probably around summer of 2003, when we started to become very close friends. I am totally clear on the fact that he's IS NOT my type. But for some reason, I realized that I am doing a little bit too much FOR him... which actually scares me a lot. I am afraid of being caught up. I really don't want to re-do the history.

And, for some reason, I don't know why I felt a bit sad when he said he may leave next year. This is not a good sign. I told myself.

I will stop this. Yes I will.